Daily Over View Today [May, 19, 08]
Quickie:
The universe is finally giving you the green light to proceed with your plans -- go!

Overview:
You may feel as if you're swimming with sharks today, but they're not as fierce as they appear to be. Try to relax and enjoy your positive energy -- you've got a lot more than they do!

let't hope this saying is true xD, because i really want to say something that this problem has been dragging for like this past 3 months. i'm not sure if this is a 'positive energy' but it's an energy that i need to release out. let's put to the point... i don't even think my friends understand me, or each other.

First, is that we don't even talk how our day goes. and actually discuss it fully. the time that we actually spent our time together as a group is in school. well not the whole school time, but just lunch. i knw it's a time where we eat, and my friends like to eat then talk. if this cont. we don't even get to talk. like we never discuss how our day went by, Chin is too shallow, while Sha is sort of being a pessimistic.

Second, as a friend of course there are sometimes we can envy each other, because we dun have this talent like theirs. remember this is wat i only think, so dun get fucking piss with me, and say "what the heck is she saying?" finish reading my point of view, then give an afterward words. what i hate that they always do, is complain. not just complaining about their lifes, well sometimes. but they always complain about their grade, projects, and idiot works and crap. like i knw how that feels, when the idiot teacher gave you this grade, and you dun like it. they say "why did i get this grade?" dun get fucking mad because you get that grade and get piss. first you may deserve that grade, second the idiot teacher graded you wrong, third go fucking ask them why you get this grade. maybe this will help you, to understand why you got this grade. and this is just only their "progress report" meaning it's not the offical grade, so think~ i knw you guys are work really hard and get the grade you guys always wanted.

I have friends that are freaking smart, don't say you aren't but to me you guys are, this is why i envy you guys. because you guys workharder than me, and a better student than me. yea i knw i compare myself to them a lot, but sometimes i just have to, and actually try hard like them. just since they were small, their english/reading grades are better than me so as math and science. i bet they got like A's - C's in their report card. LOL and they make such a big deal out of it. i got A's and F's i feel soo stupid to them, so i wish i won't do group project together.

but the point is they make such a big deal out of "I GOT AN D!!" EKKK! *freak out* i'm not like that because i have those grade and suffered though those time, now i dun even panick because i got that grade, i felt as if i deserve that grade, for being stupid. they just need to learn how to calm down. i hope they'll get into trouble for something, so then next time they won't be too perfect, saying to those dumb people "that is soo stupid of them chewing gum" or something like that.

maybe this is wat means Kamara. lol

Third, we go to school don't even talk a lot to each other. expect poking each other, saying "AWW YOU LOOK SOO CUTE!" "like shut up about DBSK" lol~ or just like Chin talks about her contacts and Shaving leg cream that's all. just URGH! why the hell do we always talk about that, i'm just sick of it, doing the same shit, talking that same shit. just are we even spending our days wisly, "seize the day" i dun even think all three of us even seize the day but fuck the day. doing the same fuck.

i have sooo much to say, i think i'm lending to no where. but to conclude, why are we even friends if we don't even hang out or talk! meaning talk about our days etc~

i knw all three of us are busy, but doesn't mean every freaking week we are busy, doesn't mean this is an excuse for not talking to each other. i'm sorry if you think everything my ways, if you dun like it just fucking say to me, so i can step down. then i'll shut up and not suggest anything anymore.

i'm must tired of this, i want a friend bond this "we are friends forever" the one that we can feel each other feelings. i have tested them like 3 times or more and i dun even think they dun even understand my feeling!

you knw like Sha said "mind as well i die" something like that (in the Sbox). i was like okkies die if you want too, but rethink. you knw i hate it, i knw i'm kinda an emo. i want to die, everyone wants to say that to escape the things they have done. but i bet in the end they give more fucking sufferings to others.

i'll rest, my face is like super hot, i think i knw why. because i'm mad and feel like i want to cry. but i won't cry for this, because it's a thought and tough thought, thinking if i should even cry for this. i'm just disappointed and sad, maybe feeling left alone.

i'll think i'll contuine later i'm not sure. but it's just a maybe. will rest. ^^

:EDiT:

will update later. finish everything tomrw :) because it's 1.35am and i want to post some fan accounts stories, finish stuffs etc ^^;; but nothing really happened

but i watch DBSK fan clips from HB and cried T-T


- Any Pig

Labels: friends, problems